London Update

Fish and chips, anyone?

Cheers from the good old UK, mates. I got in from Paris yesterday evening and have been enjoying some good times with all my family out here in the lovely London area. I've got my two khalas out here, a bunch of my cousins, and of course a handful of nephews (for you gora-fied people, those nephews would be my 'second cousins').

It's funny that I'm here again; twice in just a matter of a few months. Prior to April of this year, it was nearly 22 years since I had been to London. Hopefully my luck continues and I can go back to Pakistan soon.

A tip for those travelling here: Make sure you have the phone number and address of the place or family you're staying with. It will make the London-Heathrow Airport security experience less cumbersome. The first security guy was nice enough to let me go after I told him that I was going to Surrey, which is a county in the UK (so it'd be like telling someone at O'Hare that you're going to DuPage or Cook County). After he reminded me of that fact, I told him the only other name I know is Sutton, the town where my family lives in. Fortunately I had my phone and told him I could call home and get that info, but he let me go after writing my home address down. But as I continued walking, a security agent immediately approached me and asked me the same questions the other guy did, but went into more detail. This lasted five minutes and then he took my passport (probably to run a background check on me) and came back five minutes later. I had to explain why I went to Paris, what I do for a living, and why am I here in the UK. I told him that my company was based in the UK, so they probably did a quick check on that just to confirm it. I guess I can't blame them. A Pakistani guy with an Arabic name travelling by himself and not knowing his exact destiation does sound a bit odd. Stupid Imran. But, I was very cooperative and nice to the guy, of course, so he let me go and thanked me for my time.

Anyway, the first thing I did was go to a really good Portuguese restaruant called Nandos with Rani Aunty, Ridah, and Raafae. The food, as Farooq would say, was phenom. Nandos is a chain restaurant out here and some of the restaurants will have halal meat because of the omnipresent Asian (i.e. desi) population. Can't go wrong with that.

And so today I pretty much chillaxed with all my family. Made fun of Sami (i.e. Samia) out being older, though she tries her best to deny it. Played with the little ones a bit (they totally killed me in a pillow fight). Ate some great iftari food cooked by Shuda Khala. Joked with Sami that the only reason she wanted me to go to the mall with her was so that she could showcase me as some sort of young man trophy to everyone (to which she of course replied jokingly -- I think -- 'Wouldn't be the first time...'). We all made fun of Talha for looking soooooooo nervous and excited that his wife Mahem was finally coming from Pakistan tomorrow. They are a newly wed couple (back in February) and he hasn't seen her in person since. Now that's a killer for any guy. Married, but the wife is not with you. So, Alhamdullilah, I'm happy for the guy. But I'm not really expecting to see him after tomorrow...

Okay, sahoor is coming up soon. I should leave. Tomorrow should be fun as I get to see Musharraf give some sort of talk where they'll also have iftari. On Saturday I have to go check out some larkee for one of my bros (who I just may end up stealing for myself as he is well aware of...haha) and possibly later on tomorrow is another girl to check out, too. Oh and Sunday, too. :) I love having two khalas in the same area.

Until then, blokes!

Salaam

Paris Update 2

Bonjour!

Still living it up here in Paris, folks. Even though it's nearly 2:30am and I'm working, but that's just the way it goes. Paris has its price.

So my meetings earlier today were quite brutal. Not the presenation itself, though they did make me present as the last speaker, but my tiredness factor. Since I didn't fall asleep until 3:30am the night before, I ended up with only 1.5 hours of sleep. I woke up for sahoor around 5am and thought I'd go back to bed after Fajr, but I had to take care of business again. By the time I was done, I had to get ready for the meeting. So by the second presentation this morning, I had engaged myself in a long, tough battle of keeping my eyes open. It wasn't pretty. Thankfully during lunch, though, I got in a power nap for about 40 minutes, so that later energized me.

After the meeting, I came back to my room and emailed some people (work and personal), then finally went out for further adventures. This time I hit up the Grand Palais; a former palace now museum that boasts an eye-capturing raised window roof. It looked like it could be giant greenhouse or a stadium of sorts. Across the street from it you had another nice palace. Further down, you had the musuem (Les Invalides) that holds the tomb and body of Napoleon. No, not Napoleon Dynamite, though some of you may actually like that sort of thing. Unfortunately, Les Invalides was closed by the time I got there. In between Les Invalides and Grand Palais you have Paris' famous river -- the Siene and its classic-looking bridges that connect both sides. I took plenty of pics and video highlights, so hopefully I'll have something up soon. Oh, I did also see the Arc de Triomphe and Notre Dame from a distance. Both looked really cool.

I must say, the more I see of Paris, the more I fall in love with the city. It's quite hypnotic and very romantic. I know I've said that before, but that really is the best way to describe it. No wonder Zareen told me to tell girls that I'm in Paris. "Every girl likes Paris." And why wouldn't they? If I'm acting this gay about it, imagine a chick. (Haha...so un-sexist of me to say that, huh?)

After all that, I went back to the Grand Mosque to try and catch iftari there. I had just missed the jammat by the time I got there and all the brothers were rushing out. I was wondering what was going on until I realized that they were all lining up for iftari. Gratis (=free) food. Can't beat it. After praying maghrib and taking some pics of the courtyard, I stood at the end of the line. The way they work the food serving was like the military! You had brothers that monitored who came into the kitchen area, but it was because they had set-up all the plates. Each table had it's plate for the individual brother, accompanied with an orange and, go figure, bread. In the middle, you had a few bowls of the same dish -- salaan with shorba and chick peas. But it had a twist to it. There were also spaghetti noodles in there. Never saw that before. The food was fine, but felt good because we were all breaking our fast together and eating from the same dish, so inshaAllah we had the mad baraqa points coming our way.

I did meet someone there, too. A very, very awesome brother named Younes (i.e. Younus). Younes is young and Algerian; he's in France to complete his PhD in archaeology, which I totally give him props for. His English was pretty good and he was mashaAllah the nicest guy. We talked about "typical" things (i.e. life in the USA, what we do, etc.), but we also talked about how Islam is a religion of compassion and brotherhood. Younes was no exception to this and was in fact an excellent exemplar for these Islamic principles. He made sure that I was the first for everything between us. First one to enter the kitchen area. First one to get the food. When I tried reciprocating the brotherhood by offering him from a plate of sweets, he purposely took the smallest one. And before someone says it, it wasn't because he saw me and was like, "Dang, I better let this guy eat before me otherwise he'll eat me alive." Haha. I saw it coming, Ali & Umar!!

Before leaving, he gave me his email address as well as phone number and told me that whenever I come back to Paris to reach him and that he'd be more than happy to help me out with anything. SubhanAllah. Such brotherhood; it was like we were actual blood brothers or cousins. The feeling is quite special, I have to say. I know that sounds stupid, but that's the best way I can put it. Alhamdullilah for this deen.

Oh, before I sign off here, the one thing that really saddened me to see were a handful of sisters outside of the masjid (some quite young) who were asking for money. That hurt to see that. May Allah make things easy for them. Allah huma salay Allah Muhammad. Ameen!

Okay, room service is at the door...

Laterz!

Paris Update

AA

Alright, so it's about 1 am here in Paris and I can't sleep. Probably because after my meeting today I accidentally crashed for three hours! I was tired, but didn't realize that I was that far gone! So now I'm totally wired. Not good...

Well, when I first got to Paris, I thought it was ghetto as heck. On the drive in to the city, everything seemed so old and run down. But that was before I got into the central part of Paris. It's very beautiful. Parts of it definitely remind me of Madrid with its architectural design and old, historic feel to it.

The first thing I did when I went out on Sunday was hit up the Eifel Tower as it was right down the street. For some reason, I always imagined the Eifel Tower to be smaller than it actually is, but it's quite grand. I never thought I would be in front of it -- at least not now. It's very nice. When you get there, you can either take an elevator to the top or simply walk up to about the middle of the Tower. For some reason, despite the numerous complaints my legs tried to communicate to me, I ended up taking the stairs. But I must say that the hike up there was well worth it. The view of Paris you have is picture perfect and very serene. At certain points, they have displays pointing out famous historic buildings like Notre Dame, the Pantheon, UNESCO, and many palaces built by kings of France's once mighty and glorious past. And I'm not being sarcastic when I say "might and glorious past." With its rich history, you're immediately drawn back to old world history classes (or at least movies) that described France as a super power back then. It's quite awesome to behold it in person. So much history here...

I actually can't wait until Wednesday when I will have time to myself to do some further exploration of the city. So far all it's really been is the Eifel Tower and Champs de something or another. Haha. It's basically a really big, open field in between Eifel Tower and yet another historic building that once served as a military training camp for "poor gentlemen." And I also got to hit up the Grand Mosque for some good ol' taraweeh action.

The masjid is fairly big and really nice. It has an open central courtyard with the arches you would expect to see in a masjid. Once inside, you feel as though you're in a compound of sorts. -- protected from the haramness of the duniya! The masjid is dominated by Arabs and then by Algerians. I saw a handful of desis representing, too. Prior to taraweeh, the local imam began with a speech of some sort (in Arabic). What I liked about it was that every few minutes or so, he'd quickly say, Salawat Rasool, which prompted everyone in the masjid to say "Salallahu Alaihi wa salam." Nothing wrong with hitting up some "baraqa points." While giving his talk, an elderly black man with a white beard started to walk up and down the isles, spraying each person with a light fragrance of sorts on their head. To my surprise, no one really did anything to stop him. If someone didn't want it, they'd put their hands up, but the brother would still spray their hands instead of the head. That really distracted me because I have never seen it before. But then I thought, Hey, there's nothing wrong with smelling good in front of Allah! We need to institute a similar custom in the US. Specifically against uncles who find it compulsory to belch in the middle of taraweeh! At least spraying that fragance will diffuse some of that obtrusive odor!! I mean, I really don't need to know what uncles had for iftari. And let's get some of these uncles to change their clothes! They smell like they take fricken curry showers!

But, I digress...

I left taraweeh unfortunately early because I had not eaten my iftari at that point and plus it was getting late and I was not sure if I could easily find a taxi to get back to the hotel (which was about a 10 min drive away).

And so that brings me to today. Nothing eventful. I woke up for sahoor and had room service hook me up with some fantastic croissants and French baguette. Then the meeting was business as usual. Then I slept. Prayed. Ate at a restaurant called Suffren. And now blogged.

Will keep you udpated...

Ramadhan Mubarak & Blog Note

AA

Wishing you all a beneficial and prosperous Ramadan inshaAllah. Please remember me & my family in your duas. May Allah make this a source of gaining closeness to Him. Allah huma salay Allah Muhammad. Ameen.

Well, as you know, there's always a yearly controversey as to when Ramadan will start and which opinion to follow. In a mashaAllah brilliant article, Shaykh Amin addresses this issue from a pragmatic, logical, and very insightful Islamic viewpoint. His brief exploration of an unity is very worthwhile to read.

I strongly urge you to read it. You can find it on the Darul Qasim website at http://www.darulqasim.org/pdf/MoonSighting.pdf

Again, a very Happy Ramadan to all of you.

---
BLOG NOTE: I'm going to try to keep my blog postings during this month to a minimum as I really want to take full advantage of the precious time we have. Also, I leave tomorrow inshaAllah for Paris and London and am definitely looking forward to the opportunity inshaAllah. It'll be my first time in Paris and most definitely my first Ramadan in Paris and London. Well, I will try to at least give you guys blog updates on the latest and greatest happenings across the pond...

Cheers / Au revoir / Salaam

The Middle East's Richest People

AA

I'm speechless. Just watch! Thanks to my bro Ali for sending the link!





Pleasant Dreams, Kids!

A Man's Drive...

Hi

What drives a man? What makes him push to achieve new heights? What makes a man so focused and determined? The answer to this is simple -- a good challenge and his desire to succeed. No true man wants to lead a bum's life. Rather, a man needs to fulfil some sort of purpose or meaning in his life, irrespective of what that purpose may uniquely be. You see, a real man has goals and a "big picture" in mind. Accordingly, there is little that will come between such a man and his goal. On one extreme he will kill, lie, and/or cheat to reach his goal. On the other, he may be a text book man that plays strictly by the rules, but works hard within the framework he's provided to realize his eventual goal.

Out of this simple principle of determination, you have a lot of philosophies people adopt: Mind over matter. Where there is a will, there is a way. Just do it. If at first you don't succeed, try, try again. Etc. Not to exclude women from these not-so-gender-specific-anymore phrases, you must agree that mainstream society's depiction of these phrases are typically illustrated with men. Right or wrong, it just works out that way.

Given this rather impressive compulsion in man, we must ask ourselves: What, then, can actually derail a man from such powerful convictions? If a man is so goal-oriented, what could possibly serve as an impasse? In short, what is a man's downfall? The answer, I've always thought, is also rather simple -- women.

If you don't believe me, then perhaps you will be thankfully reassured that there is an actual study out there that was designed to prove this. The study -- conducted in what is sure to be a purely scientific environment -- discovered that "sexual cues" are distracting. Mind blogging, eh?

Indeed, an attractive woman can come into the picture and royally muck things up for a guy. He becomes suddenly distracted and (at least temporarily) loses sight of that big picture he once had. If you still don't believe me (i.e. if you're pretty stupid about things), then read this article from BBC that discusses the study that proved this: http://news.bbc.co.uk/2/hi/health/4921690.stm

Consider this from the article:
"Dr Siegfried DeWitte, one of the researchers who worked on the study, said: 'We like to think we are all rational beings, but our research suggests ... that people with high testosterone levels are very vulnerable to sexual cues.
'If there are no cues around, they behave normally.'
'But if they see sexual images they become impulsive.'"

Yeah right?! You're telling me that, clinically speaking, if a hot girl walks by a guy he is going to get distracted by it and become, dare we say, "impulsive"? I'm dumbfounded. This is entirely shocking.

So BBC, you're telling me that these guys wasted who knows how much money conducting who knows how stupid of a study to show that Girl = Distraction for Man?

Thank goodness for the scientific method. We'd be clueless and lost without it. Anyway, sorry for the banter here, but you can tell that I found it to be too funny to have actually read that there was a study conducted on the obvious.

(Note: Similar tests on women have been inconclusive so far. Go figure.)

Cheers

Revelation in Sin City

AA

As you know, I recently crashed in lovely Las Vegas, Nevada enjoying The Strip, the nice hotel resort, the weather (well, at least in the evenings when it wasn't about 100 degrees), and of course my meetings.

The Strip is totally amazing. Totally unreal. Totally haram. Totally extravagant. Totally fun.

And totally religious. Oh yes, religious...

I was dropped off by an Ethiopian cab driver named Z after the second night. Accordingy to Z there there are 10,000 Ethiopians living in Sin City. Z kindly shared this bit of demography with me after I told him that my previous cab driver was also Ethiopian. As you know, Ehtiopia is mostly a Christian dominated country, but there is a Muslim minority there, too, so I thought I would try my luck and ask Z if he was Muslim, too. I think he almost took it personally, based on how quickly he replied back saying no. Like most Ethiopians, Z is also Christian.

In return, Z asked me where I was from. I thought to myself that saying "Chicago" was probably not what he had in mind. If Z was a fob from the subcontinent, however, I would've definitely told him Chicago just to annoy him, but instead I told him that I'm Pakistani in origin. This apparently intrigued my friendly little cab driver and thus ensued numerous questions about Pakistan and Islam. Accordingly my role as a clinical project manager from Chicago here in Vegas for business suddenly turned to Ambassador of Muslim and Pakistani Relations to Ethiopia and Z (AMPREZ for short, please). Carries a hint of authority, doesn't it?

Z started telling me about how people from Pakistan come over to Ethiopia to spread the message of Islam. He then asked me if Pakistan is 100% Muslim. I told him that for the most part it is, but there are other religious minorities such as Hindus and Christians. So he asked if they lived freely to which I said yes (so far as I know, anyway!). The conversation then shifted towards Islam's perspective on Jesus (as) and partly on the Prophet (sw). I told him how we venerate Isa/Jesus (as) as a prophet and how we also believe that he will inshaAllah come back. Z was receptive to everything I told him and was totally unoffensive. Before dropping me off, he gave me a bit of advice. He requested that I pray. And that in my prayer, I ask Jesus (as) to reveal himself to me and to then ask him once this happens to ask Isa (as) who he is. Z was convinced that the outcome of this dream would lead me to some sort of revelation to perhaps embrace Christianity.

In turn, I requested that he prays to God and asks him about Prophet Muhammad (sw). To my surprise, Z and his mother apparently already did this. Z told me how his entire family and his mother were all Muslim, but because of a dream his mom had, she converted to Christianity. How interesting, huh? Usually, you would hear it the other way around. That via a dream, someone is led to the most beautiful way of life (Islam). But I guess this little encounter is proof positive that Allah guides whomsoever He pleases. So on that, I ask for His refuge, guidance, and protection for myself and Muslims all over. Allah huma salay Allah Muhammad. Ameen.


Well, the rest of Vegas, as I've been telling people about it, was pretty much like a fantasy world. Looking back, it felt as though I was in another universe. I mean, on that level, it's extremely impressive. Of course, it's hard -- if not, impossible -- to avoid the evil side of Vegas. Huge advertisements of strip clubs run rampant. While walking anywhere down The Strip, you are bound to run into Lations who unflaggingly throw cards of naked women at you. A friend of mine jokingly asked, Did you lower your gaze? I told him that even if I did, looking at the ground was no help. All those cards and magazines of nude women were everywhere. Running into a prostitute is not that uncommon either. Nor is seeing the bulging, drunk eyes of men looking at the prostitute. I only (I use that word here loosely) saw this happen once. (Thank God my mom wasn't with me...)

I guess Vegas can really be what you make of it. Totally haram or totally fun. I don't gamble, drink, go to clubs, or strip clubs, so you would think I'd totally be S-O-L. But, Vegas still has its amazing hotels -- The Venetian, Bellagio, Wynn, etc. -- and the elaborate shows and displays they set for pure, unbridled entertainment.

So the first night I was semi-forced to tag along with a doctor's son. We both took the shuttle together from the hotel to The Strip and he asked me if I was going to meet up with anyone. I don't know why I just didn't lie, but I told him "No" so we both ventured the streets together. It actually wasn't as bad as I'm playing it out to be. He was cool. His dad was one of the PI's (primary investigator -- i.e., doctor) participating in the clinical trial, so he brought his son with him. They were from Canada and he was in his final year of college. Ironically, neither of us ever asked each other our names. Odd, huh? So with my new buddy, we walked down towards Stratosphere then walked back to the main attractions like Treasure Island, The Mirage, and The Venetian. I was lucky though that the guy's main desire was not to go out drinking or to the strip clubs. In fact, he never mentioned it, which surprised me. Well, I shouldn't say it surprised me...it was probably more so a result of my mom's fervent duas to Allah pleading, Please keep my son away from girls out there and keep him safe!!...

On the second night, I was really close to going with someone else again -- this time a client. I really wasn't in the mood to entertain, so I told him to check out one of the shows Treasure Island does outside of the hotel (the one with the boats where you see beautiful, half-naked women dancing). Fortunately, he wasn't opposed to it and I was able to go on my merry way. It actually wouldn't have been that bad to have chilled out with the guy, because earlier that day during lunch we both talked how we don't drink or gamble out or personal preference and religious upbringing. Regardless, I couldn't make my Google Videos with this guy as easily, so I was bent on venturing by myself.

And now some pics...





So would I do it again? Absolutely! But hopefully next time I'd have some friends with me.

Cheers

Bears Week 2: WIN

Moose has been reborn with Rex at the helm...

Hey

We, mashaAllah, rocked Detroit 34-7.

From the Bears' website: "One of quarterback Rex Grossman's primary goals this season was to lift the passing game onto equal footing with the Bears' top-10 defense and running game. The 2003 first-round draft pick more than accomplished that objective in Sunday's home opener, completing 20 of 27 passes for 289 yards and four touchdowns to propel the Bears to a 34-7 victory over the Detroit Lions at Soldier Field."

Bring on the Vikings...

My Jeans

Hi

The past couple weeks for me have not been the same. On an emotional and physical level. You see, my older brother, Umar, took my favorite pair of jeans from me. Really, I can't tell you what this does to me when I can't wear them. No disrespect to my other jeans -- they still clothe me -- but they just cannot provide that same level of comfort as my favorite pair do. We have a lot of history. Years of it, actually. And that's irrespective of the fact that it's not a fancy shmancy elite name brand. It's none other than Mossimo. And I love it.

So when Umar somehow accidentally took it with him to Milwaukee, I was confused (Umar is approximately 1/2 my size). Do I drive up there to get them back? Or should I wait a week for when he gets back? Against my better judgment, I decided to wait a week. But as soon as he stepped into the house last weekend, I of course ask him the whereabouts of my jeans. And of course Umar tells me that he forgot them. So I had to suffer another week without them. I came really, really close to wearing khakis or even look business professional at work for once. Thankfully, however, I stopped myself from such agony and went with the back-up jeans. One is a standard Lee jeans, the other DKNY (which is steadily gaining on my Lee jeans as my second favorite pair).

So, anyway, knowing that Umar was going to come home today, I left him about five voicemail messages last night and early this morning reminding him to bring my jeans. And much to my joy, Umar brought them (as this blog entry is undoubtedly a testament to).

I immediately stripped down and wore my jeans. The feeling was sensational.

Umar was confused by it all. "Dude," he started, "you act like I brought you your favorite woman or something." To which I replied, "You did one step better, my brother."

To better understand my love affair with my jeans, let's take a look at the pros and cons of both to help illustrate my point:

Your favorite pair of jeans:
Pros
- Wear them when you want or take them off when you want.
- Comfortable. Better than your pj's, in fact.
- Never speak back to you.
- Altruistic. Always there for you. They don't care if you rip them, don't wash them, etc. You never have to spend money on it.
- Never get tired of seeing them.
- Still enjoyable even when old and unkept.

Cons
- After many, many years of abuse, they eventually fall part. But is that really their fault?

Your woman:
Pros
- Hot/fun
- Comfortable. Better than your pj's, in fact.

Cons
- $$$$$$
- $$$$$$
- Cannot spend time with her when you want or get away from her when you want.
- They talk a lot. "How was your day?" she'll ask. Just before you say "Fine," she'll say, "Well, OMG! You know Stacy at work, right? Well she said.........[10 min later]....and I'm like, 'I'm so qualified for this project, Mr. Smith'......[30 min later].....and then the idiot cut me off in the middle lane.....blah blah blah"
- Unenjoyable when old and unkept.

Haha. I know I just forever screwed my chances of ever having a girl. Oh well, at least I got my jeans...

Later

Big Pimpin in Vegas

hi

I'm back from Vegas, baby.

And that fuzzy picture is just a taste of the fuzzy week I've had out there. I mean, with all the women and drinking...it's hard to keep everything in focus.

Alright, just kidding. Kinda, though. I mean, Vegas does have a lot of women out there. And I'm sure plenty of people out there drink. But in all seriousness, my first trip to Vegas was both busy and fun. As always, blog postings to come...

Cheers

Fantasy 2006

I'm the one with the hands sticking out.

AA

Okay, first, let's get our minds out of the gutter, people. I'm not dedicating a posting to my or your explicit fantasies for 2006. While it may make for some fascinating conversation, I'll save it for another time (or just avoid it all together, actually)...

Instead, I'm talking about the only thing that matters, at least right now. Fantasy Football.

This year, me and my puthr AJ did it real big. We had a Fantasy Football Draft Party at AJ's apt. The set-up for the event was spot-on. Bags of chips, salsa dip, diet pepsi for us aging, old men, and Giordanos deep dish pizza. All courtesy of none other than AJ, mashaAllah.

You have to realize that the way we arranged for this league to get organized was very corporate and highly professional. Just take a look at the key personnel involved in the league:

Ahmed (AJ). Hydro (his one and only fault). Sayyid/Banu Hashm. Senior auditor. The League Commissioner and Shaykh. DePaul educated; DMC [DePaul Muslim Crew] member. En route for CPA and possibly law school thereafter. Chevrolet Malibu owner. Future pimped-out condo owner. Married. No kids. No pets.

---

[Does "wife" fall under the "pet" category? Just asking!]

Imran. Punjabi. Pakistani. Rajpoothi. Clinical Project Manager. Semi-co-commissioner and League Marketing Director. DePaul (DMC member), but still finishing in the ghetto -- CSU. Toyota Corolla owner. Travelling to Vegas and Paris for work soon. Single. Travelling to Vegas and Paris for work soon. Single. Trave... Get the hint, people?

---

[Oh, and part-time model.]

Badie. Arab. Palestine & Syria. Global Operations Director for a Major Media Conglommerate. DePaul educated; DMC member. BMW M3 owner. Single. Community leader.

---

[How amazing did that just sound, mA?]

Alaa (Aladdin). Arab. Palestine. Global Operations Director for Meadowbrook Homes. DePaul educated; DMC member. Porsche owner. Not so single anymore.

---

[Unknown about the kids, though. ;) ]

Affan. Punjabi. Pakistani. Arain. High-Powered Attorney at one of the Big 5 (or is it Big 3?) law firms. Northwestern educated. U of C Law trained. Hotness Factor = off the charts. My hero. Married. 2 kids.

---

[According to Taha, I'll somehow end up marrying into your family.]

Ahmad (Ziddy). Arab. Palestine. Have no clue what type of trouble he's up to these days. Maybe if he called me at least once or twice a year. DePaul educated; DMC member. Single.

---

[We had to meet our Arab quota, so he had to play...just kiddin!]

Eyad. Arab. Palestine. All around nice guy. Guidance Financial. Fellow Bears fan and Rex Grossman appreciator. DePaul educated; DMC member. Single.

---

[Seriously, one of the nicest guys out there.]

Ahmed (Hassan/AH/Prince). Kashmiri (not his fault). Pakistani. Doctor. Blah, blah, blah. How many times do you wanna hear about this kid? Seriously?!

---

[It's not a blog about him, alright?!]

Ahmed (A-Moose). Arab. Palestine. Comedian (not by profession). Kelloggs/Keebler. DePaul educated; DMC member. Has the greatest older brother of all time (next to my bros, that is). Wish he knew how to use a phone and be my friend though.

---

[He thinks he can hoop. So what if he nearly beat me and Taha single-handedly?]

Tariq. Hydro. Recently engaged. IT industry and at Accenture (imagine that). Recently engaged. My Bolingbrook homie. Fellow Bears fan and Rex Grossman appreciator. Recently engaged. My former work-out buddy. Recently engaged. DePaul educated; DMC member. Acura TL owner. Pet birds (they're mean). And former hick from Tennessee.

---

[Note: he tries to deny being engaged if you talk to him, so I had to reiterate it for his benefit. :) ]

Erik. Puerto Rican. Ecuadorian. One of my original homies. DePaul educated. Honorary Muslim (I taught him to say, "La illaha..."). Baller sales guy at Cingular on his way to mgmnt. Hooks me up with free stuff from there. Pontiac GTO owner.

---

[My original partner in crime and "significant other" at DePaul.]

Omar. Hydro. In IT, of course. Moved from my hood and is now up north in Minnesota!! WTF? Sadly will be forced to watch Vikings games. I feel the pain, bro. Cousin of AJ. Single.

---

[Dude, just when we were getting basketball and soccer down, you leave me?!]

Taha. Punjabi. Pakistani. Rajpoothi (supposedly, anyway). Not really a player in this league. He just crushes a lot. Okay, seriously...He's not a player in the league, but Hassan didn't want to exclude him from the night. Me? I could've cared less. Afterall, it was Taha that stopped me from eating another slice of pizza and having more chips and pepsi because he kept warning me, "Dude, ISNA is in 3 days." WTF did that mean, Taha? Jerk. I thought we were blood, homie.

---

[Him and Hassan's team together are called STL T&A. So much for not getting into fantasies...]

Okay, so those are all the players. The picks themselves were, overall, relatively balanced. Some people obviously came up with a couple better picks here and there. I ended up with an amazing RB squad. LT, Julius Jones, and Willie Parker. My receivers are okay. My QB is Bledsoe (in my other league I have this guy named Petyon F-ing Manning). I think Bledsoe is a huge pick, actually. He get to throw it to TO and Glenn, so I'm hoping for big things from him -- just as long as he can keep the INTs down!

Anyway, the night was definitely successful and everyone applauded the idea of having a fantasy draft party instead of making your picks at home by yourself. In person, you get to trash talk and hang out with the fellas. And there's nothing like that. Even when you're made fun of. For example, every time I stepped away from the living room to check something on the computer, everyone made fun of me yelling, Imran, stop updating your blog! or He's giving his blog readers a play-by-play breakdown of the draft picks. Punks, man. I have a buncha punks as my friends, people.

Well, as you know, one of the best ways to summarize a fun night is via pictures. So here you go:

[left to right] AJ, Taha, Ahmed, Imran [not sure what type of expression I have there], Badie, Aladdin, Affan, Eyad, and Tariq [in the orange]. A couple of the other guys couldn't make it.

The Ahmed's of my life. By the way, nice shot of your foot, AJ.

Taha is really happy (in an overtly gay way) to be in the picture as Hassan and I -- for some reason -- flash random gang signs. Well, Hassan's "gang" sign is more like, "Metallica Rocks!! White power!" Or something like that, anyway.

Aladdin in all his wondrous glory. Just look at him. And Allah Alone Gives Success.

Those are real. As this picture illustrates, his bulging biceps are in fact real. Go ahead, touch it for yourself.

One more time, ladies and gentlemen: I give you the Ahmed's and Me. (Who needs Taha, huh?) ;)

And that's all folks. We'll see how the season unfolds. You'll definitely know whether you want to or not! But, yes, you are right. It would be safe to assume that I'll win it all.

Salaam!

Great Music

Hi

Support this Muslim guy from Oklahoma (never relazied we Muslim folk represented down there). His style is country. Yep, I said country (actually, I never realized we represented country music either), but the voice is seriously very amazing, mashaAllah. I first saw him perform at ISNA last weekend and was compelled to buy his CD (Generous Peace) right then and there. Despite his country background, his message and music is in fact universal and he definitely has the ability and talent to go mainstream inshaAllah. His name is Kareem Salama. His website is www.kareemsalama.com. He's very cool, too. Support yo' peeps, folks!

Changing the beat...

And I know the videos below aren't new songs or anything, but they're fricken tight and you should watch and listen to it, okay (just like Kareem Salama's stuff)? Thanks.

The Killers; Somebody Told Me


The Roots; The Seed



Ya'll come back now!

Bears Week 1: WIN

Hey

With all the happiness in the world, I'm delighted to announce that the Bears massacred the ugly Green & Gold -- the GB Packers. Takbeer! Allahu akbar!

They were shut out. 26 - 0.

The first time this has happened to Favre. Another strong clear indication that the old man needs to retire ASAP. ("It was the first time the Packers were shut out since a 10-0 victory by the Bears on Oct. 17, 1991 -- a streak of 233 games. It was the fourth-longest such streak in league history and second-longest active streak." -- espn.com)

Now you might hear people talk about how the Bears didn't convert in the red zone, but I urge you to keep in mind that this was the first game of the season and that Rex Grossman is still relatively inexperienced. I mean, he's never played a complete or majority of a season. When he came back last year, he sparked the offense and this year he continues to do it. Amazing throws and catches from our TE (Clark), Moose, the 49 yard bomb to lightning quick Bernard Berrian. It was truly phenomenal and extremely encouraging.

The fricken media prior to this game kept the pressure and hate on Grossman so high that I heard Bears "fans" say things like Rex needs to go! Put in Griese! Well, look now, punks!

Here, read this yourself:
http://sports.espn.go.com/nfl/recap?gameId=260910009

Grossman Stats:
18 of 26 for 262 yards.
1 INT. (Not the end of the world, but something he needs to be more cognizant of)
1 TD
3-0 at Lambeau Field

Favre Stats:
15 of 29 for 170 yards.
2 INTs.
0 TDs.

The quest for the Super Bowl begins. Bismillah...

:)

Da Bears

Woo hoo!!!!

The day I've patiently been awaiting for. Game day. The first game of the Bears 2006-2007 season. The "champagne campaign" season. The Return of Rex season. The Return of the Midway Monsters season. The return of the NFL coach of the year. The return of the 6 Pro Bowlers. The return of the purpose of my life.

If you don't know, there is nothing more I love than the Chicago Bears. I live for them as they live for me. We are interconnected. We are one and the same.

And how fricken cool is it that Game 1 of the season starts off in f-ing Lambeau Field against the Green Gay Fudge Packers? Look at this stat:

"Bears quarterback Rex Grossman is the only active NFL quarterback other than Brett Favre to have multiple regular season wins at Lambeau Field."

Or this:

"CURRENT STREAK: The Bears have won three of the last four meetings with the Packers and two consecutive while sweeping the season series in 2005. Chicago has also won two consecutive games at Lambeau Field, including the first career head coaching victory for Lovie Smith, 21-10 on Sept. 19, 2004"

For those of you hating against Rex, I would kindly like to remind you of the end of the season last season where he came out to the field after two back-to-back career-ending injuries and re-ignited the Bears offense. It was only sad to see that the Bears DEF didn't play as well as they normally did during the playoffs against Carolina.

But that was last season. This season will be inshaAllah'ta'ala magnificent. Even if Rex starts off a little rusty, our Bears DEF is so amazing, mashaAllah, that they are one of the greatest offenses in the NFL today, too. May Allah bless the Bears with tawfeeq [success]. Ameen!

Game starts at 3:15pm CST today. And now, The Chicago Bears in pictures:

(all images courtesy of Chicago Bears' official webiste www.chicagobears.com)

DA BEARS!

An Ode to Masuma & Sakina...

AA

Hmm, perhaps an ode to both Masuma & Sakina is a bit (just a bit) premature, but nonetheless necessary given their first of what I am confident will be many comments on the blog...

I had the distinct pleasure of meeting both single and lovely larkees this past weekend during ISNA courtesy of none other than my new best friend, Zareen. Both girls, as you could imagine, were totally into me. Just think of how difficult it was for me -- especially given that both competitors are in fact sisters. No, not just "sisters in Islam," but blood sisters.

So a night of candid flirtation during Sakina's very elegant birthday dinner (Chili's...okay, so elegant for me, perhaps) soon ensued. It was like both women completely lost track of everything. Themselves. Their friends (Sarah & Zareen). Their new buddies (The Hassan and my bro). Their sisterhood...

Alright, alright. At the risk of forever losing my new friends, I'll stop. But, hey, they provoked it. Well with Masuma doubting my spelling abilities despite her blatant use of fictional words like "ya'll," how can you fault me? I mean, "ya'll"? Who says that? And then lets not even get into Sakina's below-the-belt comment of "...hey, will we get an e-mail alert next july when the full isna story's up?" So now you're saying I'm slow or something, huh? Was your initial impression of me that bad?!

Well, in my own Imran way, welcome officially to my blog world. It's a happy little place I call home where I can escape the harsh realities of...umm...reality and convince myself that I am oohhh so cool. :)

Masuma, for the link to the infamous cornfield story, simply click here.

And for more opportunities to laugh at me, go to http://video.google.com and in search type in Imran Shakur. 34 videos. Good times, indeed.

And finally, I would like to say -- seriously -- that it was really nice meeting both of you. You fine women were funny and very laid back. I was even more so fortunate to hang out for a good part of Friday evening/Sat morning with Zareen and Masuma. If anyone wants to know about Masuma's past and plans for the future, you need only to ask me...

Cheers

Awesome Quranic Recitation from a Kid

AA,

Courtesy of none other than my boy Sami H., here's a beautiful recitation of a young kid. It's like total Abdul Basit style, man, mashaAllah:

Duas!

An ISNA Preview...

Hi

Alright, people. I am in the process of writing my ISNA posting, but as we all know how long that can take, I thought I would at least put up a bit of a teaser for now...

You know that Jay-Z song Girls, girls, girls ("...I love girls, girls, girls, girls. Girls I do adore. Yo put your number on this paper, cause I would love to date ya. Holla at ya when I come off tour...)? Well I lived it this past weekend. So, in that light, special shot outs to Zareen, Masuma (sp?), Sarah, and Sakeena...

Alright, alright. Enough of this haram-ness and jokes. Here are some pics to hold you over...

Jeez, talk about holding you over. Meeeoooooww!

(OMG -- Did I just say, "meeeooow"??)

The Prince's new rishta pic...?
(He looks so happy, mashaAllah)

The Homies. Chandler and Ross. Bada bing, bada boom.

Stay tuned...

Faces of the Business Professionals

Hi

Indeed, you're looking at the future of America's business professionals right here, folks. Future executives. Future ballers. That type of thing. The synergistic alliances between Deloitte, Starbucks, and CP are but a few steps away... [inside joke; sorry]

As AJ is on the dawn of travelling to SF for a couple weeks and me to Vegas, Cali, and Paris we have come to the same realization that we are both very phenomenal (mashaAllah).

Cheers

Maurice Clarett is an Idiot

Holla at me Gangstaz

Maurice Clarett is an idiot. A man who had tremendous promise in the NFL and potential opportunities beyond any "normal" person failed to realize his promise by getting involved in two things:

1. Himself
2. Questionable company

These two things can often times ruin a man. Conceit or arrogance can leave a man blind to reality. Questionable or shady company will only set a person back from achieving his or her goals.

Read this story and be the judge for yourself:

http://sports.espn.go.com/nfl/columns/story?id=2545078


Holla back

Punjabis vs Hydros | Muslims in The Workplace

AA

My goal for eventual assimilation of Hydros in the Chicagoland area has taken a small step forward. At work, the latest fellow Clinical Project Manager is, I'm proud to say, a Muslim Punjabi. On top of that, I actually know the guy from before, too! MashaAllah, he's a cool person and I'm looking forward to working with him. I can't tell you how great it is to have one of my "own" people there at work. Aside from my brief stint doing research at UIC/VA Hospital for about 6 months, I have been primarily Muslim-less in the workplace. In fact, usually I am the single face of Islam most of these people have to personally deal with.

It's not like I was dying to have another Muslim desi (Hydro, Punjabi, Memon, whatever) working with me, but it is nice. I have an extra accomplice for lunches and more importantly another person to pray with, too. While I thankfully get along really, really well with everyone at work, it's still good to have some sort of familiarity there as well. Not having to listen to someone about how good their night was because they went out to the bar (or "pub," when I'm talking to my UK counterparts) is actually refreshing. And having an element of brotherhood adds a "realness" factor to it that's just hard to put into words. Perhaps you need to be in the same work environment as I am to fully understand all this. To understand that the comfort speaks for itself, though I am the first to protest against having too many desis at the work place (thanks goodness I'm not a programmer!). That can drive you crazy. In Corporate America, much like you need your daily dose of caffeine, you also need your daily dose of goras. Seriously. I mean, how else do you expect to climb the corporate ladder? :)

I'll also mention that another nice thing to have another Muslim working with me is that I've always been a strong contender that more Muslims should get into the pharmaceutical/clinical trial industry. The opportunities are really phenom in that it's very interesting and can also be very rewarding (especially if you work directly for a sponsor/pharma company). So, I guess seeing the new guy is comforting for me in that there's actually another person in my community that can relate to and understand what I do. Explaining my career to pharma "outsiders" can be challenging. You tell it to a desi uncle or aunty and they think that you're a pharmacist. They actually look down on you likely thinking to themselves, Oh, so he couldn't make the cut for being a doctor, so he's only a pharmacist. And then when you try to clarify it some more, they just look at you strangely as if they have suddenly forgotten how to speak or understand English. It's very frustrating. So now, moving forward, I can say, "Oh, Aunty, there are a lot of desis in my field. It's growing rapidly." And then I'll finish my conversation with them by saying, "...and I get to go to Paris, Vegas, Madrid, etc. for free." At that point, they've suddenly understood everything I said for the past 10 minutes and they conclude by saying, "Oh, vell, I have a daughter that..." Sigh! Desis!

Well, to get to my main point here... So now I finally out number Baseer and his goons (the Hydros) with the new guy (Sarosh). The reason being is based on the following simple axiom: One Punjabi is the equivalent in strength and overall appeal than 10 Hydros. Just keep that principle in mind, folks. Anyway, here are some excerpts from our emailing today (you'll see why I like Sarosh so much now):

Imran [in response to Baseer selling out on me & Sarosh for lunch]: "Yeah, dude. Just because we're both Punjabis and you didn't want to feel like a minority doesn't mean you should stop coming to lunch, dude. We're a passionate people. We love all..."

Baseer: "Punjabi, Schmunjabi..."

Sarosh: "Look at our illusturious hydro brother...so sad he had to bring himself to the all time low of blatant unintelligable name calling. Alas...what can we expect of him...he is hydro you know...(OH SCHNAPS....NO HE DIDN'T...OH YAH HE DID). let the good times roll"

Baseer: "Only good thing that came out of Punjab is smelly Sikhs and wheat....(OH SCHNAPS....NO HE DIDN'T...OH YAH HE DID)"

Sarosh: "I guess if all else fails...just copy the punjabi. ;-) Here's looking at you kid"

Baseer: "This is awesome...BTW, Discover needs those phones cleaned by tonight...[note: that's a running inside joke reference of referring to my company as CleanPhone]"

Sarosh: "Just ask Imran...he'll agree. The last hydro said the same thing...damn man you guys must have some kind of dialogue you follow whenever you talk to punjabis."

Baseer: "yeah we do...cuz punjabis' vocabulary is limited to a small number of words and their combinations..."

Sarosh: "Your logic is a little messed up...if hydros are the ones following a script/dialogue...then how is our vocabulary the limited one? Makes you wonder how you got your job over there at discover.... BURN!!!"

Imran [as you can see, Sarosh was enough of an assault, though Baseer got some good ones in...]: "Hydros are still mad that they never had it in them to leave Hindustan and join the men in Pakistan."

Baseer: "HEHE..the men that ran away for a small portion instead of staying and claiming all of India?"

Imran: "No, we ran away from the odor of Hindustanis and their beotches (= hydros). No sane man could tolerate that..."

***
And so the fight continues.


DISCLAIMER: For my sensitive readers out there, you should note that this is in all good fun. In fact, I talked to Baseer later in the afternoon and we joked about it. We laughed on how it was funny to see the tables turned on him, because usually I'm the one being attacked by him and some of the other guys. In the end, we're all brothers and we all love one another.


Holla!