The Last Weekend...

AA

Well, it's knocking at my door. The weekend. And I hate to say it, but I am not looking forward to it...

Normally, you live for the weekend. It's the oasis of your week. It replenishes your mind, body, and soul and I really don't think that that's much of an exaggeration. I mean, what makes Friday's at work so great is that you know when you go home you do NOT (typically) have to go into work the next day or the day after. Coming up with excuses for putting something off becomes so easy and living with that decision is okay because you have the entire upcoming work week to worry about it! So, in other words, in anticipation of the weekend, procrastination becomes justifiable and a widely accepted excuse on Fridays!

But for me, this weekend is something that I'm not too pumped about. It's "the last weekend" of unbridled freedom for me. Beginning on Monday, I inshaAllah start my new job, which is absolutely great and exciting, but the fact that I have to take on responsibility, accountability, and commitments again is really problematic to me. In fact, it's a personal conflict I have with the way I've been leading my life lately.

Taking time off in between my old job and the new one has been great. And that entire rhetoric of "You'll get bored doing nothing" is crap, people! And not just crap, but utter and absolute sheer crap!! Have people who made such arguments ever attempt to do nothing? Obviously not, because I assure you, they would never say that! Let me give you glimpse of what doing nothing really means:

I slept on average by 2am. The earliest I slept was at 1:30am and the latest was fajr.
I woke up on average by 10am. The earliest I woke up was 9:30 and the latest at Noon.

I ate like a king. Usmania. Champs. Brown's. Usmania Chinese. Desi Grill. East-West. IE. Baskin Robbins. And ghar ka kana, too, of course. And that was just in one day. Just kidding! Relax!

I practically lived with Taha and Erik. I owned downtown Chicago.
I cleaned my car.

I made commitments. I broke commitments.

I sat around doing absolutely nothing. I napped like a fat cat.
I came close to reading a book.

I downloaded music and tv shows to my iPod. I added new friends on Facebook. I checked out girls on Facebook. The days were mine to waste or use wisely and it was absolutely phenomenal. And now suddenly I'm faced with reality. The work life fast approaches me once again and concentrating on doing nothing (yes, it does require concentration and absolute resolve) becomes difficult, if not impossible. But I will have to rise to the occasion somehow. I guess for starters I will force myself to sleep by 8pm...

Well, inshaAllah, I hope that the stress from the previous job isn't there, but that there's every bit of success and much more inshaAllah. Include me in your duas.

kh

The Facebook Skit

Hi

We're all well familiar with Facebook, right? I mean, really, who isn't? When you have guys like Sayeed and Harris join it (though Sayeed later left FB), then you KNOW that FB is not only completely halal, but a completely ubiquitous and ever so addicting cultural phenomena. In fact, I know a guy who actually deactivated his FB account because he found it to be a high source of fitna and a serious distraction at work. FB has replaced the hype that was once Naseeb, Friendster, or dare I even say MySpace?!

What helped FB gain popularity was first its exclusivness (i.e. school/college networks), but anyone can now enjoy it's fun user friendly design. (Why do I feel like I'm writing a paid endorsement for FB?) Writing on people's "walls," changing your current status, creating albums, tagging friends in photos (or yourself like I often do), and poking others have steadily become a normal part of our livelihood. To not log into Facebook for a day is like telling me that I can't have ice cream for a day. Like, WTF? What could I possibly do then?

So much is FB a part of our lives that you can find tributes ("odes," if you will) to FB on YouTube. Seriously, just type in "Facebook" on YouTube and there'll be plenty of videos dedicated to it. One of particular enjoyment - especially in the desi world - is Penn Masala's tribute to Facebook and the hundreds (I'm sure of it!) of desi stalkers there are on FB [props to Umar for finding this]:




"You can't take my mouse away..."

:)

The iRack

AA

This is a really funny spoof by MAD TV, so you may have already seen it. The "iRack" - coming to a store near you!



Cheers

The IT Crowd

Hi

Okay, I have to credit my bro Umar on this find. If you especially like British humor (or "humour") you'll definitely be a fan of this show. It's hysterical...



Cheers, mate!

Quote of the Day

Hi

Well, today's quote of the day had to be from Erik...

When driving home talking to Erik about life, relationships, and things of that nature, I had taken a slight pause in our conversation to celebrate the joy of eating ice cream and specifically the ice cream that I had just ordered from McDonald's (look, I had a crazy, inexplicable ice cream attack at the time and McDonald's happened to be the closest, most accessible source of such a fine dairy product).

In response to my cheer, Erik looked over and said to me in all seriousness, "I hope I never get as pathetic as you when I'm single."

His statement was so random that we both couldn't stop our "giggling" (as Erik referred to it for some really gay reason).

Well, to be serious here myself, the thing is I can't help it! Not being married and all ball-and-chained up gives a single guy A LOT of time to kill. Accordingly, such a single guy has to find alternative means to fulfilling satisfaction in one's life. If, by happenstance, satisfaction is achieved via ice cream, then so be it, dammit! But don't make fun of the guy! Maybe he has the same perspective on ice cream vs women as he does on jeans vs women...

Cheers

An Ode to a Raccoon...

Hi

I'm embarrassed to report to the world that I accidentally killed a raccoon today. I don't know if things will ever be the same for me.

There I was driving down the dimly lit narrow roads of Plainfield on my way back home quietly minding my own business when suddenly a raccoon with impeccable timing decides to play chicken with me; only to realize that I wasn't playing back!

To give you an idea of my traumatic experience, the sound I heard was a loud and heart-breaking "CRUNCHITY CRUNCH." I yelled like a little girl, but kept driving because I couldn't believe I was one of those people that ran over raccoons. I finally decided to pull over to check the damage to my car. But like I said I was driving down the dimly lit narrow roads of Plainfield, so I couldn't tell a fricken thing!

After being satisfied that I didn't cause any damage to the c-dub [credit Sami for the name of my car] - at least externally - I was compelled to drive back to the scene of the heinous crime. Soon enough, I came across the 'coon. He lied there lifeless in the middle of the road. Or so I thought.

I looked closer (never leaving my car for fear of an army of 'coons would come to claim vengeance) and saw that it was breathing. Surprisingly, the innocent creature of Allah wasn't bloodied up. After staring for ten minutes arguing with myself as to what I should do, I drove off depressed as to what I just did. :(

Poor guy. He's hopefully been able to muster up enough strength to crawl back to the side of the road to safety where his children eagerly await him. His wife is probably out there running through all the cornfields of Plainfield in desperate search for her...

Okay, I'm being dramatic now. But I believe that this is the only way I can cope with this. I feel bad. I said "inna illahi wa inna ilahi rajioon." I think that's enough, right, inshaAllah? And writing an ode to him. I mean, that's pretty big, too, right?

Well, here's some info on raccoons. Apparently, even if I wanted to nurse him back to health, I couldn't. Something about rabies...

Fi aman Allah

Muslim Pick-up Lines...

AA

These are always entertaining, but I don't recommend using them. You may get slapped. Trust me, I use them during the ISNA conventions ALL the time, and I never seem to get anywhere. I just don't get it. Here, read 'em yourself...

1. "I'd like to be more than just your brother in Islam."
2. "To watch you pray is a sin of its own."
3. "Will my platinum VISA cover your dowry?"
4. "Muslims are supposed to have many children, and I am willing to do
   my part..."
5. "Do you believe in the hereafter? Oh you do? Then you know what I'm
   hereafter."
6. "Lets get married so I don't have to lower my gaze every time you
   walk in the room."
7. "I've had to fast every day since the day that I first saw you."
8. "Would you like to help me wake up for Fajr?"
9. "Are you a Shiite? Because when I saw you, I said to myself, "She
   aiight."
10. "Girl, you fine. I see praying five times a day has paid off."
11. "I know Halal meat does a body good, but damn, how much you been
    eatin'"

Okay, seriously, I think these are the types of things Ali or Umar would say to girls if I didn't manage their personal affairs. Man, I'm the greatest little brother EVER!!! (mashaAllah.)

Cheers

Man vs Machine: Texting

Hi

This guy is fast, but this technology is pretty tight if this wasn't some cheap marketing trick...



Cheers