The Pharmaceutical Dictionary Released! (exclusive!)

Hey -

Alright, so I actually clicked on the link Umar provided to the FDA to see their commentary on the word "hypoallergenic." It is kinda interesting. Basically, the FDA suggests that pharma companies made up the word for marketing purposes. How clever. And conniving!

I can totally see it: Pharma companies getting together at an undisclosed location (i.e., secret chamber underneath icebergs in Antartica) to make words up. In fact, believe it or not, I know this happens. Just between me and you, read the following transcripts taken from such a meeting. For your own safety, don't ask how I got the transcripts. Just be thankful...

"The following is a comprehensive list of definitions that we [big pharma companies] will slowly inculcate the world with:

drugs: (noun)
1: A substance absorbed by the human body through a number of different ways. Drugs are aimed at producing high levels of addiction causing the user to buy more.
Cinnamon (okay, technically, synonym): medication(s)

2: A substance used in high levels by poor people. Also, a substance used in excessive levels by rich kids that are the sons or daughters of American political figures.
Example of use: "Hook a brotha up with some drugs, yo! A brotha has to live, right? Holla!"
Synonyms: medication(s)

money: (noun)
1: Coins or notes used to buy certain items.
Example of use: "We live for money" or "We need more money" or "Let's buy doctors off with money."

2: See: bling, bling.

marketing: (verb)
1: An auspicious way of conducting business through the use of tangibles such as paid-off mortgage bills. Intangibles include vacations to exotic cities that makes the marketee (the one being marketed against) feel good.

doctors: (noun)
1: Individuals qualified to receive formal methods of bribery.

2: The pharmacetical industry's best friends.

FDA:
1. A cover-up organization designed to..."

Well, that was all I got. I hope you...
Oh shoot...I hear footsteps behind me. Gotta go!

Rgds.