Bears: An analysis from Irfan

Hi

Recently on the Sports List (an email list of like 20 guys talking about sports - usually Chicago area sports - along with other random things like cake, sgp's, and dbc), Irfan went on a tirade on Da Bears and provided teh following insightful analysis. I was so moved, I had to enshrine it by putting it on my blog:

"I apologize in advance for the following email but i had to get it off my chest. I am having major trouble controlling my intensity!

OFFENSE
1) Why is it so hard for this team to ever have a decent offense? In my lifetime, the only decent offense I got to see was one year under Erik Kramer. I mean are qb's that hard to find? Why cant we just buy one? I mean do we need to steal the eid expense boxes at every eid jammat this year to help the bears, im all for it if thats what it takes.
2) Our qb has the brain of a 5 year old, how hard is it to learn "throw the ball away", my god, this man seriously has a head full of nothing but beer and cliche lines such as, "i know i have to play better". That's great you stupid moron, now how about putting that to use.
3) Our running game sucks, CB has not done the job and neither has our O-line. Kruetz needs to punch someone maybe, i dont know, but this O-line is nothing like the line from last year.
4) Our WRs are absolute pos, i hate em all. Berrian is a #1 by default, he sucks, he dropped a sure touchdown. and dont use the excuse of "well patrick crayton dropped one for the cowboys too so were even". NO WE ARE NOT EVEN! Crayton is a #3 receiver, #1 receivers such as Berrian dont make bonehead drops like that, I expect better. Also, can we just cut Moose now, my god, the man cant get open if his life depended on it. He's not even fasting, he has no excuses.
5) Ron turner - seroiusly we need to run like an 8 tight end offense because apparently they are the only ones he can ever diagram a halfway creative route to get open. Why does this guy get touted as a genius? As far as i can tell, him and his brother (who is ruining LT's life!) both are morons, I hope they get caught in a wild love triangle in which they get caught doing one another while ron rivera tapes the whole thing while performing "billups style" in the corner! Then we can maybe fire him!
6) Overall - lovie needs to cut the cord, but what gaurantee do we have that griese will be any better? our wr's cant even get open, we cant run the ball. While rex makes bad decisions and should be benched, griese will also be forced to make throws into small windows since his wr's cant get any separation. and since his arm isnt as strong as rex's i wonder if he will fare any better. this offense is killing our defense which is probably morally dejected at this point, not knowing why lovie wont just punt on first down and let the D try to score that way.

DEFENSE
1) Mark Anderson - seriouisly can someone let this guy know that doing the same move every time is not going to work? He did his patented speed rush on the first play of the game and then we never heard from him again. Seriously what did he do all offseason?
2) Ogunleye - this is the most useless pos we have on this team, my god what a giant behemoth of crap, i hate him. Did we hear his name even once, other than when he got injured? This guy is supposed to be the guy to put pressure on the qb, seriously! this guy is garbage, we should cut him now and send him back to zamunda. Other than allowing us to make references to Coming to America, he provides no value whatsoever.
3) Archuleta - i hate him, your typical goru safety, "he provides toughness" and he's "a big hitter". He couldnt tackle me, let alone an nfl player. He cant cover anything including his gf's body. I didnt like the deal when we got him, and i hate it more every week. and he's supposed to be good in run situations, he got run over like 10 times last night.
4) Overall - Our D line blows, we cant get any pressure without blitzing, t harris is double teamed and nobody takes advantage of single coverage (zamunda, brown, anderson, walker). Our secondary and LBs are left hangin cuz they have to cover receivers for 7 -10 seconds each play. On top of it, our offense couldnt sustain a drive if their lives depended on it so our D studs are dropping like flies to injuries that could have been avoided if they got some damn rest!

Quite simply, our offense still sucks, and we better spend whatever it takes to get a decent offense next season. As far as the rest of this season is concerned, I still think we can win, but we need to run the ball consistently to have any chance.

and i ate so many chicken wings to console myself last night, and now its wreaking havoc on my stomach!"

cheers

An Ode to Rex Grossman - The Paradox

Hi

It's such a tease with Grossman. I’m so frustrated right now.

Tonight’s Dallas-Bears game has left me depressed and distraught; especially over Grossman, whom I’ve shown support since his rookie year. We’re all familiar with the all too familiar Good Rex/Bad Rex title. But what else can we say about this Dr. Jackal and Hyde quarterback?

The drive that started with his run for a first down and ended up tying the game was clutch and indicative of an elite quarterback who has the ability to rally his team and control the game’s tempo. But then he does things like 3 INTs and you're just like, “WHAT?! HOW?!” and eventually left dumbfounded.

The quarterback position in Chicago for at least the past ten years can be likened to an amusement park. Grossman is the ultimate roller coaster ride successfully taking fans through breath-taking passes, tumultuous twists and turns, incredible highs, dangerous lows, and in the end leaves you confused: Do you hop back on for another or move onto the next, safer ride?

A part of me still wants to defend Grossman, but there comes a point where you just have to take a step back and move on, right? I guess this is a question that Lovie and Turner are probably mulling over right now (well, at least I hope they are).

Look, I am the first one to support loyalty and I appreciate and respect Lovie’s “Rex is our Quarterback” mantra. But at what point do you cut your losses and say, “While Good Rex’s upside is absolutely incredible and undeniable, the inner jihad he has with Bad Rex is far too costly to the team.” Or does a head coach look beyond the player and begin to take a look at offensive coordinator Ron Turner? Does Lovie begin to realize, due to his own defensive specialty, that maybe the fault lies with Turner’s play-calling and he has had too much faith in Turner? Where can we circulate the blame?

The buzz that generated during the off season about our offense was not only surprising (since it came from such media outlets like ESPN), but it seemed justified. We drafted Greg Olsen at the TE position and Rex looked like he had a connection with him. Rex improved on his mechanics such as his leg work. We introduced Devin Hester to the mix. Bernard Berrian seemed poised to take Moose’s Number 1 slot. We still had Rashied Davis and Desmond Clark who both contributed to last year’s offense; and let’s not forget Mark Bradley, too. Cedric Benson showed promise and we had decent back-ups in A. Peterson and Garret Wolfe. With such a line-up, how can you go wrong?

When talking about tonight’s game, I think my good friend Fahad put it best when he said that the difference between Bad Rex last year and Bad Rex this year is that Bad Rex this year is costing us our games. Bad Rex last year could have thrown an interception or two, but the impact was not as significant (especially in tonight’s game).

I like Rex. I still like what he has to offer, but I am a Bears fan which means that I will always support what’s best for the team. It’s just been difficult because you know that so much of the game can be mental, too. And you know that the criticism and coverage Rex gets from the media can be vicious and, at times, in excess. He’s still relatively young in this leadership position. Last year marked his first full year as a QB; let’s not forget that. But at the same time let’s also not forget that we need to effectively utilize the tools we have to win games – and win games in a potentially dominant fashion, too.

Looks like the roller coaster is starting to squeak and the only thing that might help out – for now – is some good ol’ fashioned Griese.

In support of Rex, but the team, too…

2 Days Away: Halo 3 - Believe

Hi

I can't wait. But I need a 360 first...



Yours truly,

Master Chief

Another Google Video Moment - "Rock climbing" in Denver

Hi

Yes, the time has come folks. Long has the world gone without an Imran Shakur Google Video (ISGV) moment! These classic ISGVs have transformed the way people see themselves as they realize, like I have so long ago, the power of recording yourself for the entertainment of others and how it can directly correlate to refining your abilities. Abilities like knowing how to take video clips of yourself so well that it looks like someone is taking it for you. For this is a skill not many a ninja have (how cool did that sound?!).

And so, folks, make no exception here. This is another such video. But this time, instead of coming from some exotic place abroad, my journey takes you to Denver, Colorado and specifically the Red Rocks - home of the Red Rocks Amphitheater.

This video captures my gallant efforts of trekking the unknown wilderness of the Red Rocks. Be warned, oh reader, that during footage I am attacked ruthlessly by insects and who knows what else. This is very similar to Man vs Wild. I should submit this to the Discovery Channel.

Without any further delay, allow me to introduce you to…myself. Rock climbing and hiking like you’ve never seen before:

http://video.google.com/videoplay?docid=-503498354518578814

cheers

Leave Britney Alone

Hi

So, I’ve finally gotten around to watching what all the hoopla was about in the “Leave Britney Alone” video. As of this posting, it’s had 6 million plus people on YouTube see it with probably that many spoofs done on it as well. I think as a blogger, I have certain obligations to post something like this out of mere blogging duty. And nothing more.

As for any insightful commentary about this or what this says about our Hollywood-obsessed culture, well, I’ll leave that to you.

I warn you, this is kinda scary and will leave wondering, “WTF?”



cheers

Fantasy Football 2007

Hello

About three weeks ago, AJ and I held our 2^nd annual Fantasy Football Draft Party at AJ’s place just like last year (though it was all AJ, mA – I’m just co-commish). For the most part, we had the same people from last year, but with a couple changes. We excommunicated A-Moose and Ziddy due to their lack of commitment to the league last season. Ziddy and A-Moose really didn’t update their players; in addition, Ziddy’s picks were made basically by Hamza (Badie’s brother). With this year marking the year for a keeper’s league, we could not risk any such nonsense. So, we made two great acquisitions to this season to replace them: Fahad and Kamran.

The only people that missed were MIA was Badie and Erik, unfortunately. They could not attend in person nor could they attend via the teleconference call-in number we had set-up. Everyone else was able to make it one way or another including, via teleconference, Affan [from NYC], Omar [from Minnesota], and Tariq [mad props to Tariq from calling-in from India!!]. “Live” attendees included the commissioners (Pac/AJ), Aladdin, Taha/Ahmed tandem, Eyad, Fahad, and Kamran.

The set-up for the draft party was as follows: AJ got the chips and dip along with Giordano’s pizza (one thick crust, one think crust) and drinks. Let’s not forget the great chocolate cake desert. Fahad did it big by bringing his brother’s projection so we could hook up a laptop to it and display it on the wall for everyone to see. We timed each pick by having it set to a minute (Taha was the time keeper; the only reason why we tolerated him there).

The activities started with STL T&A (Taha/Ahmed) having the number one pick! Needless to say, we all know who got LT. How lucky can you get especially when starting a keeper’s league? The most intriguing picks of the night have to go to Omar who picked players like Greg Olsen, Garrett Wolfe, Bernard Berrian, Marques Colston, Cedric Benson, and Devin Hester. Granted, some of these players would be decent pick-ups late in the draft, but Omar picked these guys (except perhaps for Wolfe) pretty high and when other better FF players were available! We were all shocked with each pick he made wondering what he was doing out in Minnesota to cause to him to make such picks?! But, my respect goes out to him as a fellow Bears fan for picking so many of our players. He also has the Bears DEF, but he picked them in the 2^nd round!

Anyway, for the most part, I’m satisfied with my team. I’ve got studs like Brady, Barber III, Willie Parker, and Romo. My receiving core is alright with Driver and Terry Glenn, but the only problem is that Glenn may be gone for the rest of the season. I might have to give up Romo for a stud receiver.

Anyway…here are the guys (sans the teleconference people):

Good times as always

Da Bears: Kick-off Report

Hi

As fate would have it, the Bears unfortunately lost today against one of the best teams in the league – the Chargers. The loss is further emphasized by the potential loss of Mike Brown – the Bears and NFL’s premiere safety. There is none like him in heart and play-making ability.

Even before today’s tragic injury, Brown ensured that he did not leave the game without intercepting Phillip Rivers and recovered a fumble. He left the game, though, in tears as I was told by Fahad because of the possibility of being out for the year – once again. In that sense, Brown is the new Rex Grossman from a couple seasons ago. Grossman repeatedly suffered season-ending injuries and now Brown is facing much the same. I ask you, as this is near and dear to my heart, to make dua for his full and speedy recovery. We need him on the field for so many reasons.

As for the game itself, it was frustrating in many ways as the Bears-Colts Super Bowl Game was; both games were winnable and in both games we made dumb mistakes and lost out on scoring opportunities. Grossman in some ways still looked like last year’s “bad” Grossman; but at the same time, Grossman looked like Tom Brady with some of his phenomenal passes to Berrian. He also got popped – there’s no other way to put it – twice, but that wasn’t his fault.

In some good news, however, our DEF continues to be DOMINANT. I mean, we were playing the Chargers, folks. For the ignorant: The Chargers are one of THE best teams in the league in terms of offense and defense. Despite that, we only allowed two TDs and you have to consider the fact that Bears DEF was out on the field for waaaay too long. And we made LT – the league’s best RB and top scorer – look like a chump with his running game. At one point in the game, he had 9 rushes with -1 yard. That’s NEGATIVE one yard. At the end of the game, he had 17 carries and 25 yards! The back-up RB on the Chargers (Turner) had more.

We were essentially screwed by Antonio Gates’ performance and also by shooting ourselves in the foot (repeatedly) by missed opportunities/frustrating plays (i.e. fumbles, punt return where SD recovered the ball, etc.).

Overall, I am pretty bummed out about it. But, it’s the first game of the season and we have a long way to go. Our defense looks phenomenal and our offense inshaAllah will soon take over. But, please, please make dua for Mike Brown.

Da Bears!

ISNA 2007

AA

Well, ISNA weekend has come and gone and “gone” being the operative word here for Chicagoan ISNA goers. Unbeknownst to me, ISNA has decided to alternate city locations for the annual ISNA convention. Next year it will take place in O-hi-fricken-o, which means that there is a 0.00001% chance that I will go. The only thing that could possibly compel me to go is if I finally decide to reserve a booth promoting my blog.

Anyway, allow me to give you my ISNA highlights of 2007: (I’m writing to you, by the way, live from an airplane en route to Denver for work. I thought you should know that because I am convinced that my legion of blog readers often wonder where I write and what I am wearing. Please text me privately regarding my current attire.)

Friday night: No ISNA activities largely due to Huss not calling me back and Taha being with his new BFF Faisal Raja. Regardless, I at least enjoyed a phenomenal AJ-Pac Day and the excellent company of my relatives in the evening.

Saturday night: Totally dissed again by AH and his “hunny bunny," Zareen (as they like to call each other for ridiculously silly, mushy reasons). AJ ditched me for his second wife, Sofia. And Taha ditched me for his family – the only valid and excusable excuse here. Saturday, however, was an exceptional day for me as I got to spend a large part of the day and evening with my shaykh, mashaAllah.

Sunday: ISNA day. Ali and I roll through and we first check out the bazaar. The bazaar for the most part seemed pretty typical. Lots of places for chicks to buy clothes and jewelry. Companies selling properties in, for example, Medina. The CIA and Dept of Homeland were recruiting (clearly, they’re no longer hiding the fact that they’re closely monitoring ISNA). Many beautiful art booths. Many beautiful girls walking to and fro. And so on. So we rendezvous with AJ who mA introduces us to Imam Zaid Shakir (May Allah protect him). AJ, doing it big as always, buys me Seasons (Zaytuna’s quarterly journal) so that Imam Zaid can sign it for me. We were also fortunate enough to have Imam Zaid make dua for us personally. By the way, I have to say that Imam Zaid's eyes were very captivating. They had the nur and look of a person preoccupied with Allah. So, yeah, he's on another level. May Allah grant him success.

Almost immediately after that, we had the distinct privilege and honor to meet Shaykh Faraz Rabbani – founder of SunniPath.com and someone I have been emailing for many, many years questions ranging from fiqh (jurisprudence) to the spiritual. Shaykh Faraz remembered who I was after a brief intro and even mentioned my blog! The fact that he is aware of my blog (most likely because I have it as a part of my signature in my email) is both momentous and embarrassing. Momentous because it’s Shaykh Faraz; embarrassing because I really hope he avoids reading the more…err…thamasha-like entries. Shaykh Faraz also has a blog and is listed as a link on my blog page (see Seeker's Digest). He usually has really interesting links up there ranging from education, technology, best practices (in things like time management), and of course Islam. It was also great to know that Shaykh Faraz met with Shaykh Amin, too, and advised me to benefit from him as much as possible. InshaAllah.

Not too long after meeting Sh Faraz, we also saw Sh. Hamza Yusuf at the Zaytuna booth. He was really nice to everyone he met - giving each person as much time as they wanted. AJ said that I had to do it big myself and strike up a long coversation, but by the time I got to him, they were trying to rush people because some brother before us seemed like he was telling Sh. Hamza his entire life story. Regardless, it was a blessing and great opportunity for us to meet these scholars.

Look, I know it sounds like I’m talking about these scholars like they’re rock stars, but the reality is that they are much bigger than that. They are pillars in our deen in our time, mashaAllah, and their guidance is inshaAllah inspiring...

Ali and I (though Ali slept through much of it) also attended Dr. Umar's - of the Nawawi Foundation - Meet the Author event where he discussed his book A Muslim in Victorian America: The Life of Alexander Russell Webb. Russell Webb's life and time in which he lived is pretty amazing. One day, I'll have to read his book (don't laugh). Yep, it exited me that much. Webb knew people like Mark Twain and others like Susan B. Anthony and Frederick Douglas attended the same talks he attended. Pretty unreal if you think about it.

Moving on...so of course we run into a buncha people. Highlights would include meeting Zareen’s twin sister, Samar, and Masuma at the Embassy Suites lobby. Unlike her sister, Samar was skinny and didn’t ask if I wore designer clothes or accessories. But, like her sister, she asked if I could write her an ode on my blog (which I have since been considering). The epic meeting between Samar and I was simply an inevitable cornerstone that had to be reached in my previously exclusive virtual relationship with her. I had only known Samar through pictures and through random Gmail chats where she got freaked out that I wrote about my love for her on my blog prior to meeting her. It's a long story, folks...

As for Masuma, it had been our one year anniversary, but all I got from her was a very nice smile (which I'm not complaining about). I even mentioned how I wrote an ode - no small feat - to her a year ago, but I got nothing more than a I'm-smiling-because-I'm-just-being-nice-to-you-you-freak look. Maybe she didn't talk to me that much because I didn't get her anything for our anniversary? Maybe she didn't talk to me because of the fact that I did write an ode to her (and her sister)? I don't know. I don't get women...

My ISNA experience for 2007 ended by attending the main lecture of the night – the MSA’s guest speakers which included the Yasir Qadhi, Imam Zaid and Shaykh Hamza with a couple others. Shaykh Hamza was good as usual, mashaAllah, but ISNA’s coordination of when his talk started was terrible. We sat there forever before he got up there to speak. We had to listen to the over zealous MSA president - whose passion was not contagious but totally obnoxious - talk about how great the MSA is and our youth and blah, blah, blah. Needless to say, the MSA president is a girl and they're generally pretty excitable. Yes, I did just say that!

Lastly, I’d just like to conclude that the real success of ISNA were fun, pleasant conversations with AJ’s wife, Sofia. Apparently, the gifts I’ve gotten them worked. Even Sofia said jokingly (I hope), “Keep the gifts coming.” Sigh. Women. No matter what the relationship is, they always want stuff. Be it chocolates from Belgium or odes on a blog.

Until ISNA returns to Chicago (or goes to someplace like LA, Miami, NYC, etc.), I'm out.

A 300 Workout

Hi

Only Hulk would forward this to me (Hulk = Taha, btw):



IS THAT ALL??

jeez

Been a minute...

AA

Well, beloved fans and bored people, it's been nearly a month since my last entry. I apologize for my blog disappearance.

I've been thinking about contributing factors to my disappearance and have come up with the following list:

1) Recent traveling. It's not like I've been traveling hardcore like consultants do, but make no mistake that recent traveling alone can account for just over a week of non-blogging. Trips to Brussels, London, and DC.

2) Facebook. I hate to say it, but a website that I've grown to love and respect so much (Zuckerberg's face may as well be plastered all over my desktop) has contributed rather significantly to non-blogging time. I am addicted to it. FB is probably the main source of me selling out on myself. With uploading pictures and providing my comments for each one, it's done nearly half my blogging right there. Instead of writing about an event and posting the pictures on my blog and online at Picasaweb or Kodak Gallery, I'm uploading all new photos to fb. Nowadays, people are saying, "Upload those pics on your blog" more so out of a respected tradition, but they immediately follow-up with, "AND MAKE SURE YOU TAG ME ON FB!!" And instead of writing about how I feel, I can now update my status to "Imran is sexy" (I feel that way quite a bit). The fb phenomena is crazy, but moving forward I'm going to ensure that fb time no longer infringes blog time.

3) Social demands. Being who I am can be, well, difficult. On any given day, AJ will want me to himself in Elmhurst, while the STL duo will require me downtown. Meanwhile, there are demands from The North Side crew, Sarosh, and the "Do Me" crew. And let's not forget Erik, too. I'm even in the process of trying to holler at good ol' Anish aka "Dumb Day Dave." Sigh. I have to stop. The thought of me being so popular and cool, mashaAllah, is beginning to tire me...

4) Working out. Well, as of the past two/three weeks, I really can't use this as an excuse anymore. But, it was a valid excuse initially for non-blog'age. I was into this whole existential phase for a good month in my life where I wanted to eat healthy and work out. It was a total out-of-body experience, dude. Then shortly before Belgium, things kinda slowed down and then all together stopped. (InshaAllah, I'm looking forward to geting back into the mix soon.) But, basically, I'd get home from working out and was just too tired to blog, so I'd look at the latest fb updates instead. InshaAllah, when I get back into the work out groove, I will make sure that this, too, doesn't impact my blogging.

5) Timing. By the time I feel like blogging again, it's gotten to be pretty late or I'm distracted by something else (sleep).

I think that's it. Why I'm acting like this blog is so important to so many people including myself is beyond me at this moment. Or why I'm acting like it's been months upon months since my last entry is equally mind boggling. But it's late and the words and thoughts are flowing like a river, so I'm just going with it...

I'll see you guys on here soon. Go on, hold your breath. It won't be that long...

:)