Diet Plan # 673

Hi

Alright, man. Let's do this, Imran. This time once and for all. Get psyched. Get ready. No exceptions. You're gonna be freakin hardcore about it. Feel it, man. Ready?! Are you ready for this, dude?! Bring it! This time for real...

I'm going on a diet. That's right, folks, I said it.

"Diet." The most fearsome and daunting word any self-respecting Punjabi munda can ever utter. The thought of it sends cold shivers down my spine. It penetrates my heart and soul with icy daggers. It makes my stomach flip and dance like a whirling diverish.

But this time, I'm gonna do it. Let's make it even more official: Bismillah. There now. It's officially official. I've taken Allah's name and asked for His assistance, tremendous favor, mad, mad hook-up, Mercy, and Guidance on this (yeah, A LOT of time was spent making dua) and have posted it on my blog so that I can be under the constant scrutiny and eye of all my friends and families.

Yep, I've put myself out there. I'm hanging by a fricken string now.

This diet, however, is not going to be a fad diet (i.e., low carb diets, no carb diets, blah blah blah diets) but a Sunnah Diet. Portions will be well-maintained. Yes, "well-maintained." I like the sound of that. Whatever the hell it means. Haha. Sorry, I havta laugh at myself because I just thought of what a "well-maintianed" dinner plate could look like for me right now: It would be proportionally balanced to include salan, samosas, biryani, half a nan, and a ladoo or two. Now that's a well-maintained diet. Hmm, I guess I should re-phrase myself here (wow, I'm so mentally ready for a diet, aren't I?).

My sunnah diet will consist of smaller, reduced portions. But I will not leave ice cream. Ever. InshaAllah. You can't pay me to leave it, so why should I try to kid myself about leaving ice cream or junk food for that matter? Why should I willingly subject myself to pain, misery, anger, and severe, traumatic depression? I say all this because I've experienced all those emotions when I've tried to stop taking ice cream before (you may have remembered reading something in The WSJ about Coldstone Creamery's stock plunging around that time).

The second part of the plan consists of a work out regimen. Well, not really a "regimen" per say as that sounds like I have to make some sort of committment (AJ, can you tell the readers how I am about making committments?! Haha). But a plan that includes some workouts up in the mix. But it has to be at least 4/week. InshaAllah.

Alright, enough talk. I'm gonna do this. Starting tomorrow morning, of course. Come on. It's 8pm on a Sunday night. You really want me to ruin the rest of my weekend with thoughts of a diet? They call tomorrow the Monday Blues for a reason, right?


Done and done.